All Mark Twain Quotes
In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.
Mark Twain in
Education
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Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.
Mark Twain in
Anger
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Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
Mark Twain
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Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
Mark Twain
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It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them.
Mark Twain
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My books are like water; those of the great geniuses are wine. (Fortunately) everybody drinks water.
Mark Twain
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I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
Mark Twain in
Death
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It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
Mark Twain
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Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.
Mark Twain
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