“I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either.”
Other Jack Benny Quotes
My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never.
Jack Benny 
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Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.
Jack Benny
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Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
Jack Benny
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