Top Pants Quotes
My belt holds my pants up, but the belt loops hold my belt up. I don't really know what's happening down there. Who is the real hero?
Mitch Hedberg
Why would people spend good money to have my pants?
Shawn Ashmore
Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn.
Irvin S. Cobb
Those hot pants of hers were so damned tight, I could hardly breathe.
Benny Hill
If you make a fool of yourself, you can do it with dignity, without taking your pants down. And if you do take your pants down, you can still do it with dignity.
William Shatner
All Pants Quotes
There were many times my pants were so thin I could sit on a dime and tell if it was heads or tails.
Jonathan Swift 
55% of people like this quote
A child learns to discard his ideals, whereas a grown-up never wears out his short pants.
Karl Kraus 
54% of people like this quote
If somebody's pointing a trembling finger at your pants and saying you shouldn't be doing that, follow that finger back, go up the arm and look at the head that's behind it, because there's almost always something fairly woolly in there.
Jock Sturges 
54% of people like this quote
I thought I would dress in baggy pants, big shoes, a cane and a derby hat. everything a contradiction: the pants baggy, the coat tight, the hat small and the shoes large.
Charlie Chaplin 
54% of people like this quote
When you perform in front of an audience after only two days of rehearsal, you're flying by the seat of your pants - particularly when they're rewriting the show right up to the moment the camera goes on.
Michael Richards 
54% of people like this quote
In Cleveland there is legislation moving forward to ban people from wearing pants that fit too low. However, there is lots of opposition from the plumber' union.
Conan O'Brien 
53% of people like this quote
We only have one agenda, which is to make 'em laugh their pants off. Unless they are girls, of course, when it is to make them laugh their bras off so we can get a quick look.
Adrian Edmondson 
53% of people like this quote
No, I'm happy doing this. Five sweaters and a pair of dirty pants, you can make pretty good money.
McLean Stevenson 
53% of people like this quote
Popular Pants Authors
Winston ChurchillTheodore RooseveltJosh BillingsJonathan SwiftBaltasar GracianMitch HedbergKarl KrausJock SturgesLarry DavidCharlie ChaplinJohnny DeppNicholas D. KristofWilliam ShatnerShawn AshmoreGeraldo Rivera
Chris LeDouxConan O'BrienEvel KnievelEmeril LagasseBenito MussoliniNavjot Singh SidhuJackie CooperJoe E. LewisRobert ScheerAaron NevilleLeif GarrettJai RodriguezLiv TylerPatrick WarburtonElla Wheeler Wilcox
More » 
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Theodore Roosevelt
Sally Rand
Patrick Warburton
Winston Churchill
Benny Hill
Edward Steichen