"Clean laundry helps the confidence level, which helps the self image, which helps um, you win games, which makes you rich, which leads to greed, which leads to more money!!!, Which causes immense spending, which then triggers high anxiety, which causes a heart attack at the age of 31 and puts you in a coma for 10 years while you lose all of your money and you start at the beginning again!"
--Benjer Petersen

"If it's about computers... it can wait!"
--Rachel Halladay

"Don't spend your life as a pretty bitch... God will send you back nice and ugly!"
--Fritz

"I had gone searching for the truth, and found facts instead. I hate that."
--Anonymous

"I was playing poker the other night... with Tarot cards. I got a full house and 4 people died."
--Steven Wright .

"This morning I took two Ex-Lax in addition to my Prozac. I can't get off the john, but I feel good about it."
--unknown

"When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities."
- Matt Groening.

"Diplomacy is about surviving until the next century. Politics is about surviving until Friday afternoon."
--Sir Humphrey Appleby.

"You'll earn thousands of dollars daily by doing nothing."
--Found on a piece of paper in a Fortune Cookie .



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